Dating in todays day and age literally is like being publicly executed…

Yea, that’s a tad dramatic.  But all in the same to me a 100% true statement.


Where did this dirtbag come from?

Last time i was officially single we didn’t use cell phones like we did now…we had cell phone cams of course but the thought of taking naked pictures really wasn’t something that people were doing then….well i’m SURE there was some people that were but definitely not like they do now….now it seems to natural to whip out a tit and be like BOOM.

(Not that i’m speaking from personal experience or anything of course…..)


Here recently, i have slowly started sticking my toes in the dating pool to kind of see what the hell is out there.   What is floating around and see what i can catch.


This pretty much sums up THAT experience.

Standing outside a strip joint (don’t ask)  The cop that was doing the pat downs and id checks and myself casually started conversation….He was VERY adorable….so much so that i was kind of taken off guard but of course i played it cool….didn’t notice him at all  😉 ….not to mention the fact that he had just patted down the guy that i came there with.  (don’t ask)  As were talking he mentions a ex so i decide to take the bait and ask how long ago was this EX,  “Years”  he says….so i’m thinking cool…ex from years ago, no worries there.   He’s very well spoken and so cute i needed to know…

ME: “So how old are you?”

“25” he says……

(oh course he is…..  ) figures

ME: “Aww you’re a baby….”   

“Well my ex was 33” he says…… 

ME: “So you like older women then….?”

He nods…


Maybe it was the atmosphere, maybe it was the mood of the night, maybe it was his amazingly gorgeous smile…

ME: “whats your name?”

“****” he says…

ME: “Whats ur number ****?”

(he gives it to me, and like a dirtbag myself i call it while were standing there….)

ME: “Ohhh it better ring , it better ring” i say jokingly….

It did.

Remembering that i had someone inside the club waiting for me i figured i better get back inside.  So after the night was over we walk out and i wave to him, let him know i was going to call him later…. I text him that night… short convos, cute etc but something in me felt…off?

Call it sixth sense, call it intuition, call it self consciousnesses , i don’t care what you call it but this guy is WAY to hot for me….!!  Why would THIS guy give me his number, why would he text me, why would he want to sleep with me….because the first red flag was the mention about how my boobs were the focus of his attention, in maybe the first 5 lines of our conversation….  (i’m used to that tho, why the hell else are they there??)

U can find anything about anyone if you look hard enough, i found a girlfriend, i found a girlfriend he buys tiffany things for….i find a teeny tiny gf that is about 4’11 a size 3, cute as HELL!!!

What the fuck?  I am NONE of these things, i am not even close.  So my suspicion grows farther and i start THANKING my lucky stars that the night he was trying to swindle his way over to my apartment i was tired enough to pass out on that text message… He tells me to come see him at work so i do…. he tells me how he is unhappy, shes possessive….he tells me other things about his life which i of course fall for….we flirt, we make eyes at each other hugs at the end of the night…i come home….

“I totally have heart eyes for you i cant wait to get to know you better!” i text….


No biggie,  hes busy. Hes a cop he usually takes a bit to respond to my texts anyway i fall asleep and go to work the next day.  Still not thinking anything of it because he works at night and sleeps in the day he’ll text me when he wakes up.


i send him a sexy NON NEKKED selfie…..


Wellllll okayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy then.  Now i know what your thinking….you know he has a gf….why continue??!! …..fuck if i know i was thinking with my vagina.   Guys do it all the time FUCK why cant women, its such a double standard.  And i will be honest when i tell you i fell for everything he told me…i fell for his sincerity, his unhappiness in his relationship   i fell for it…. i wanted to have him in my apartment and console him and show him “older women” things…..

He has vanished….still is vanished and i cant help but think to myself, ok what in the fuck happened?!   What went wrong…?!  At first i blamed myself, i did something wrong.  He saw me in better light and was like ew gross fuck that…..

But then…after a conversation with Roland last night  (yes im weird i talked with my ex boyfriend about it for advice)  I realize.  he did me a favor….he kept that ugly ass karma away from me…he is a child anyway he would have NO IDEA how to handle me anyway…..

True story…


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